Author Archives: Stacey

cold and horny

Posted on February 27, 2011 by Stacey

There’s a little more to the “to pee or not to pee” story that I left out. Remember how I said that the Lil Pisser managed not to get the crap beat out of him that night? Well, here’s how. … Continue reading →

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the little pisser

Posted on February 24, 2011 by Stacey

Today’s Crossfit Workout was named: “Drinking from the Firehose.” I’m not sure why, since there is no drinking and no creative use of a firehose as one of the exercises, but I like the name. It reminds me of a … Continue reading →

Posted in Crossfit, Kiteboarding | 4 Comments

blind man’s bluff

Posted on February 23, 2011 by Stacey

One of the games we played when we were little was called “Blind Man.” One person would put on a blindfold and then the rest of us would lead him around the yard by the arms and get him into … Continue reading →

Posted in The Formative Years | Leave a comment

she might be an eight … but on a scale of what?

Posted on February 17, 2011 by Stacey

Yesterday, my imaginary boyfriend showed up at the gym with his real live actual girlfriend. At least I think it was his girlfriend. She called him a cute, lovey-dovey pet name and tried to hold his hand during the warmup. … Continue reading →

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wheelchair cowboy

Posted on February 5, 2011 by Stacey

The only thing I remember about Red Dragon (one of the Silence of the Lambs movies) is the scene where Phillip Seymour Hoffman gets superglued to a wheelchair, set on fire, and goes careening down the street in a burst … Continue reading →

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dude ranch

Posted on February 1, 2011 by Stacey

So here is the best idea I’ve seen in a LONG time: WHO KNEW!!! There are actual ranches that raise DUDES!  I CANNOT believe that I’ve been alive this long and I completely did not know this.    And not only do … Continue reading →

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idiot mud jog (dba warrior dash)

Posted on January 30, 2011 by Stacey

Yesterday I drove north for three hours in my gas-guzzling Jeep Wrangler, to participate in the Lake Wales, Florida, 2011 Warrior Dash, a “mud crawling, fire leaping extreme run from hell.” Today, I am sitting here, back on my couch, wearing … Continue reading →

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helmet head

Posted on January 29, 2011 by Stacey

So today … uggh … in just a few short hours, I’m supposed to be three hours north of  where I am right now (on my warm and comfortable couch) – to somewhere remote, in the middle of the state, right … Continue reading →

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storybook fashion

Posted on January 29, 2011 by Stacey

Since it’s cold here in Florida right now, I had to wear a jacket today.  It’s blue and felt-like, with oversized buttons, and I love it like no other jacket I’ve ever owned: it’s warm and cozy and makes me feel safe. … Continue reading →

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the great sewage disaster of 1969

Posted on January 16, 2011 by Stacey

I wasn’t a stupid child. I didn’t stick marbles in my nose, or forks into electrical sockets, and I didn’t write on walls with crayons.  For all my faults (conniving, ultra-serious, unpleasant, etc), I wasn’t a dummy. I would never … Continue reading →

Posted in The Formative Years | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments